Baa Hum Bug

At this moment in time, I want nothing to do with Christmas this year. I just don’t know if I have it me. I have done no shopping (I refuse to really start until after Thanksgiving except for stuff that I just happen upon… which hasn’t occurred this year… ever shopped with a one year-old… not much time for browsing) and the thought of 16 extra people in my house makes me want to run screaming. Yes, I said 16 extra people, making 20 total. This count is both Sam and I’s families, so you have the added stress of trying to combine everybody’s traditions, which do not line up at all. Unfortunately we have the best house to gather at (although Sam’s parents house works for his side just as well) but for my family there really isn’t an alternative option (although this could be solved if my mother would move like she has talked about for the past 6 years). And we have the only small children on either side, so if I don’t want to haul the kids to multiple locations (that are multiple hours apart) over the course of the day, I feel stuck… but I don’t want to do it.

I think my feelings are because I have not enjoyed the past 2 Christmases. 2 years ago, I was 9 weeks pregnant and very ill. This meant that I passed most of the work to Sam but I still felt the stress of it and did my best to just be present when all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball. Last year was the first year of both sides here at the same time and I had a 4 month old that was nursing. We had my family all sleep here for multiple nights, which meant feeding and cleaning up after 12 people for most of the week. And since Ned was 6, Santa pulled out the stops and filled stockings for all 12 people that woke up here Christmas morning. And it was a ridiculous amount of gifts all around and just felt like too much stuff for me. I wish there was a way to back off the gift giving, at least for the adults, but I’m not sure how to do that tactfully.

The biggest bone of contention from a traditions stand point is food. My family feels there has to be a roast of some sort with all the fixings and Sam’s family has a tradition of tacos for Christmas. Neither feels it is Christmas without. 2 years ago we had tacos, because my mom was the only one from my side here and last year we did roast because Sam’s brother wasn’t here and so we would be having a second Christmas with that group when he could be there and had tacos then (don’t even let me get started on Christmas 2.0… or we could be here all day.) But what to do this year when there will not be a Christmas 2.0 for tacos?

I just don’t feel like I can do the combo again this year, there has to be a way to make everybody happy without stressing me out. I don’t feel like I can host my family on Christmas and tell Sam’s they can’t come. And if I did they would gather elsewhere and I would be creating the 2.0, which I find ridiculous when it is all the same people plus 2 (or 4 in this case). But I wonder if I could convince my family that they should be at home for Christmas day and get together a few days later? And maybe I even ask if we can move Sam’s family back to the in-law’s house… hmmm… we might be onto something.

Oh, and I have to note that I talked over some of these feelings with Sam and he told me he would take over the gift buying. To which I scoffed because, well, he is a man. But he has been hunting out ideas and all which has helped a great deal in bringing down my panic. Now if we could just convince both sides that the adults don’t need to all exchange gits, I might be able to find enough Christmas spirit to actually enjoy the next month… and do Christmas cards which is one of my favorite things but I haven’t done in years because there is just too much else to do.

Weaning and Sleep

Mica has been slowly weaning since we introduced milk after his birthday. He was mostly down to before naps and bed but would occasionally ask outside of those times. At those times it seemed as if he was just making sure he would be allowed to and he was done almost as soon as he started. But for sleep, he wanted to nurse. This lead to him conked out but not wanting to unlatch, which lead to a lot of screaming when mean mommy took it away.

Last week we left Mica with grandma and grandpa for a couple of days while we took Ned to do some testing out of state. I have only missed putting him down about 10 times in his life and most of those I have come back to find him asleep in the arms of somebody. I was very concerned about how Mica would do without me for that long (and me without him) but it was best for everybody involved for him not to tag along. He did well for grandma and grandpa although putting him down was a bit of a struggle. This might have to do with them wanting him to sleep with them and them having to find out the hard way that it wasn’t going to work. But he did sleep and only gave me the cold shoulder (in favor of Sam’s shoulder) for a little bit. When we got home it was bed time and he nursed to sleep like always.

I was happy that our trip hadn’t forced him to wean completely but also disappointed that it had not. I have been ready to be done for a month or so but I didn’t want to take it away from him before he was ready. Ned weaned right around this age and it just felt right to me (although he dropped from 3 feedings to none over night, which didn’t feel so great.) But I felt somewhat selfish in wanting to be done, because it is Mica’s only form of comfort. He doesn’t use a binky and hasn’t found his lovey, which Ned had both when he weaned. Plus he is most likely my last baby and as long as he is nursing he is still a baby, right?

Anyway, he nursed a few more times last week, once a day I think, but we are now on day 4 of no nursing, so I think it safe to say he is done. We have had to create a new bed time routine but it seems to actually be better and involve less crying then our old one. We now read books in Sam and I’s bedroom (where we always nursed) and when we are done reading we transition to his room where we rock and sing for a few minutes and then I put him into bed. He will cry a little as I leave the room but it is not the hysteric that were following me unlatching him and he is normally done by the time I make it downstairs.

And on top of that, he is also transitioning from 2 naps to 1. He had been taking a nap from 9-11am and then another in the late afternoon. But the afternoon nap had become a fight. He would scream for long periods and then a handful of times when I did get him to actually sleep, he slept though the night and wake up at o’dark thirty in the morning. So I have moved his nap back to 11am, and he is sleeping for 2-3 hours and I moved bedtime up to 6pm. It seems to be working well… although I probably just jinxed it by writing it down.

Other things of note:

• He is a full on toddler. Running, climbing, screaming, and throwing himself on the ground when he doesn’t get his way.
• He is a master signer. He will mimic so many signs and give them back to you if you say the word. He will ask “please” on occasion which is really hard to not give into. He is combining multiple signs and even making up a few of his own. His verbal language is at a bit of a stand still but he makes the first sound of some words while he signs them.
• He is obsessed with the sounds that things make. I think he is more interested in the sounds that animals make then what they are named. And musical instruments and vehicles as well.
• Up to 12 teeth now, 4 top, 4 bottom and all 4 first year molars. His incisors are ready to pop any day now.
• This boy hates having his diaper changed. He fights and kicks and screams bloody murder. I’m tired of it… really thinking about trying to potty train early.

The Never Ending Soccer Seasons are Over

Ned has played soccer almost constantly since Mica was born (with Sam coaching 2 of those 5 seasons), so I’m very glad that we are finally done with this past season and taking the winter off. Ned will be playing basketball instead so we only have a few blessed weeks of no sports. Ned loves all sports and I love that he is active and having fun with his friends. I just never imagined myself as a soccer mom and the coach’s wife. Mica also loves to get out and run with a soccer ball. Only a few more years until he can play as well.

Stats for the this season: Rec. Team regular season 2-2-1, Rec. Team tournament 1-1 to finish in 3^rd place, Tournament team only played one weekend and we were 1-2 and Ned finished out the season with a just for fun 3v3 tourney where his team finished 2^nd at 2-1.

We also took Ned to his first pro Soccer game as his birthday present. He enjoyed the game and I think learned a bit more about how the game should be played. Sam and I wished that we hadn’t gone on the coldest, wettest and windiest night of the season but we cuddled together and watch the local team win. And the smile on Ned’s face was worth it.

“I’m going to take 4th grade math next year”

Interesting conversation with Ned last night. Started out as a discussion about what sports he’d be playing next year, but then he brought up that he wished he had done the math competition a few weeks back. I told him it was okay we could do it next year.

Ned: Yeah, as a fourth grader!
Me: Actually you will be in middle school math, so you will compete with the middle schoolers.
Ned: No, I’m just going to take 4^th grade math next year.
Me: But you are in 5^th grade math this year, so next year you will be in 6^th or even 7^th grade math.
Ned: (starts freaking out a bit) No I don’t want to, I want to take 4^th grade math.
Me: What would you take as a 5^th grader?
Ned: 5^th grade math.
Me: for a 3^rd time?
Ned: Yes, it would be easy. I will take 6^th grade math as a 6^th grader. 7^th grade math as a 7^th grader. And so on.
Me: Are you worried about going to the middle school? I guess you could just work with GT teacher for math.
Ned: NOOOOO!
Me: Why not? Because you like working with other kids?
Ned: Yes. I don’t want to talk about this anymore.

Leaves me wondering, is he worried about going to the middle school? Is it that he wants to be competitive in the math contest, or worse crush the competition considering he would have 2 years of 5 grade math plus gt work? Or is he looking for the easy/slide through school without working route? I will have to try to get him to discuss this some more sometime and I wonder if I should give school a heads up so they can maybe tease out a reason.

Worst thing is that it makes me wonder if we are pushing him too hard, although he loves 5^th grade math and has an B+ so it is clearly not beyond his ability. The other thing it has me wondering is if him doing 3^rd grade math has shown him how easy it could be. Yeah, think I will need to have a conversation with GT teacher to get her take on it.